Wayne Besen - Author, Activist, Columnist, Public Speaker

Monday, August 01, 2005

Zack, the 16 old boy who was taken to an "ex-gay" boot camp against his will has been released. He finally blogged on the issue today, sounding overwhelmed, but also disturbingly influenced by right wing lingo and views on sexuality. The boy strangely defended the ministry that uprooted him from his life.

"Love In Action has been misrepresented and what I have posted in my blogs has been taken out of perspective and context. I don't take back the things I've said, nor am I going to pretend like it never happened. It did. I refuse to deal with people who are only focused on their one-sided (biased) agendas. It isn't fair to anyone. I'm very frustrated with the things going on in my life now, but everyone has their issues. Homosexuality is still a factor in my life--- it's not who I am, it never has been. Those of you who really know me, know that homosexuality was always there but it didn't run my life, and it will not now."

Notice how he uses right wing buzz words like "agendas" and now homosexuality is "a factor" in his life. A key part of what "ex-gay" groups do is separate people from their sexuality. Once they make this unnatural split, it is easier for people to try to stamp attraction out of their lives. Of course, in the end, it never works.

Zack also attacks the media.

"The media, in my opinion, has made a big of a mess of things. But, I suppose they did what they could with what they had."

I wonder if he was referring to his fathers debut on Pat Robertson's 700 Club. Or the free publicity milked by "ex-gay" media whores like Warren Throckmorton and John Smid?

The boy requests his privacy and we ought to give it to him. Indeed, he should be left alone to have his childhood. But it is worth comparing the free-spirited blogs before boot camp with the Stepford post after the ordeal. Was he brainwashed? I really have no idea and hope he goes on to live a wonderful, successful life. But, take a look and decide for yourself. Here were the previous blogs:

"I told my parents I was gay," he wrote. "This didn't go over very well," and "They tell me that there is something psychologically wrong with me, and they 'raised me wrong.' Today, my mother, father and I had a very long talk in my room, where they let me know I am to apply for a fundamentalist Christian program for gays."

"It's like boot camp. If I do come out straight, I'll be so mentally unstable and depressed it won't matter."

Unless more develops, I won't post on this in an effort to let the boy reclaim his life. But let the record stand. Today's Zack speaks in a different voice than the one before boot camp. Finally, the big question, Is Zack straight?

"Homosexuality is still a factor in my life..."

If this is so, does Love In Action plan to refund the money that Zack's parents spent on the program? My guess is that returning the dough and making Zach straight both have zero probability. Once again, Love In Action laughs all the way to the bank, while a family struggles to pick up the pieces.

23 Comments:

Poor thing sounds like they poured Tide in his head. Yep, he's brainwashed.

Alice
New Mexico
posted by Anonymous, at 8/01/2005 9:27 PM

I agree, he sounds a lot more programmed. And - it was interesting to see that the program failed.

Swen - Boston
posted by Anonymous, at 8/01/2005 9:28 PM

Definitely brainwashed. He's using all of the code words that the sick fundamentalist and ex-gay movement uses. It would almost seem that tapes were played over and over until it sinks in. All that is missing is "lifestyle choice" , pro-family, "moral values", but, I'm sure these are included. Makes me absolutely sick to read what he wrote post cult camp. Tim W.
posted by Anonymous, at 8/01/2005 11:54 PM

At sixteen, He can be: Easily intimidated, confused, cohersed... should I go on? Remember how many things we were told when we were young, by our parents, about homosexulity, masturbation, the role of women in society, etc. that were not true at all! I don't have any hair in the palms of my hands, and I am a wanker!... well, apply all that to a kid that don't know anything about love or life, and that is most likely being intimidated by his own parents... and imaging if the poor thing is brainwashed or not. The free world can not do much for him at this point, but to all of us, this is a call to be role models and examples for the new generations of Gay and lesbian kids, particularly the ones in our families, in our classrooms, in our churches, so we can give them a better world than the one falwell and all the sons and daugther of darkness that follow him wants to torture them with. Only true love can fight the work of the enemy and his followers. The seed of evil is planted in those people who call themselves "Christians" and use to word of God to confuse people.
posted by Anonymous, at 8/02/2005 12:10 AM

What got to me was the comment he wrote to one of the comments on his blog:

"B,

I'm very greatful for your concern. The only thing I would like to say is that, in my personal experience in LIA, everything had it's purpose. The rules and procedures - looking from the outside in, looks horrible. Once you're inside, you're mixed with people who want to be there as well. We spent most of our time together. I don't think it would be fair to the other clients, if, because I didn't want to be there, the environment should be less strict and less safe for those clients who do, really, need to be there. Parental Rights is a separate issue though. But I'm not going to expand on that one now.

My Pleasure.

Posted by Zach :' ( on Monday, August 01, 2005 at 2:13 PM"

It all makes sense once you're on the inside...
posted by Willie Hewes, at 8/02/2005 3:12 AM

This is a kid who's been through 7 different kinds of hell in the last couple of months. He had to come out to his parents, have them take it badly, become the center of a media storm, then get carted away to boot camp for 2 months.

Of course he's pissed.

And, keep in mind that whether or not the indoctrination worked, his parents are almost certainly reading his blog at this point.

If he really has been indoctrinated, well, he's young, and statistically he'll probably get over it by the time he's 21 or so. If he's playing the game, that's what he has to do, because the real problem isn't the LIArs, it's his parents' unaccepting attitude, and he's got to live with that at least another 2 years and longer if he wants them to pay for college.

The best thing right now is to just leave him alone. One way or the other he'll get free eventually.
posted by Anonymous, at 8/02/2005 9:02 AM

Did Zach's parents expect, when they paid for the 'therapy', that Zach would emerge desiring women and no longer desiring men?

Does Zach now desire women and no longer desire men?

If not, did the parents get what they paid for?

Or did they think they were only paying for 'therapy' to give Zach another outlook on homosexuality, or to 'help him cope' in some way?

Was the distinction between those two possible 'products' actually made clear to them?

If I go to the car showroom to buy a new car and say that I want a red Ford, I would expect there to be no ambiguity. I would not expect to have a blue Peugot delivered instead. If that happened, I'd send it back.
posted by Anonymous, at 8/02/2005 12:52 PM

His profile still lists his orientation as "gay"

He may have picked up a few terms at the camp but I think it may be premature to call him "brainwashed."
posted by Anonymous, at 8/02/2005 2:10 PM

Give him a few years to wash the Clorox out of his mind. He was reprogrammed, no doubt about it, but no amount of "Christian" braindraining is going to change who he is. The sooner he realizes this, the sooner he'll wake from his coma.

--Johnny in Minneapolis
posted by Anonymous, at 8/02/2005 5:50 PM

It seems that living in rural Southern American Bible-Belt (akin to our nation's Hell-berta) gave this young adolescent few options to achieve a positive outcome.

Of course, the "therapeutic protocols" is all about what Wayne described it as being.

Albert and I raised two children to adulthood in a loving "marriage" of thirty years, that two years ago finally received legal sanction. The quotation marks are no longer real.

PFLAG Canada has a new mission in a new Canada. We will pray for a successful outcome for this person. Not knowing his socio-economic and educational family backgrounds, it is hard to determine whether or not he will become another self-loathing closeted heterosexually-married homosexual loitering in parks and restrooms.

Someone said it in this thread - there are many other young adolescents like Kyle who need the help of healthy gay and lesbian couples engaged in activism - in order to achieve a better outcome.
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