Saturday, January 07, 2006

Slippery Rep. Tom DeLay
has abandoned his bid to remain as House majority leader. In a letter to rank-and-file Republicans, DeLay said,
''During my time in Congress, I have always acted in an ethical manner within the rules of our body and the laws of our land. I am fully confident time will bear this out.'' At the same time, ''I cannot allow our adversaries to divide and distract our attention,'' the Texas Republican wrote.
Yeah, right. He's done nothing wrong.
Has their ever been a sleazier House Majority Leader? All I can say is thank God the DeLay era is finally over. He will go down in history as one of the most corrupt politicians ever.
It is kind of fun to watch the GOP unravel because of their inferior values and hypocrisy. But now is not the time to gloat. Well, why the heck not?
GLOAT - GLOAT - GLOAT!!!Damn, that was fun.
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A report by Congress's research arm
concluded yesterday that Bush is full of shit. It said that he offered weak justifications for the warrantless eavesdropping and that his unAmerican actions conflict with existing law and hinges on weak legal arguments.
The Congressional Research Service's report rebuts the central assertions made recently by Bush and Attorney General Alberto R. Gonzales about the president's authority to order secret intercepts of telephone and e-mail exchanges between people inside the United States and their contacts abroad.
The findings, the first nonpartisan assessment of the program's legality to date, prompted Democratic lawmakers and civil liberties advocates to repeat calls yesterday for Congress to conduct hearings on the monitoring program and attempt to halt it.
They ought to get to the bottom of this. We elect a president, not a king. Bush wants Americans to trust him, so he can do whatever he damn pleases. The problem is, we don't trust him, because he has squandered his credibility by consistently misleading the American people.
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(Duke Taking A Bribe?)
Allegedly closeted congressman Duke Cunningham, a California Republican who pleaded guilty Nov. 28 to taking $2.4 million in bribes - including a yacht, a Rolls Royce and a 19th Century Louis-Philippe can - from a defense contractor,
wore a wire at some point during the short interval between the moment he began cooperating with the feds and the announcement of his guilty plea on Nov. 28.
According to sources, the GOP is freaking out. Not only do they have to contend with sleaze lobbyist Jack Abramhoff ratting them out, but now "Duke" may be a turncoat who betrayed them by taping their conversations.
Aren't these he guys who were elected by values voters? Christian conservatives want to be taken seriously, but they are the only people in America stupid enough to look to politicians for their moral guides.
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Friday, January 06, 2006
The Washington Post reports that the scoundrels in the GOP are fighting over who should be in charge, now that so many Republicans are tied to sleazy lobbyist Jack Abramhoff. Personally, I think they should all step down because they have hurt this nation. This is a group that has crusaded on a platform of morals and values, yet, has proven to be less than ethical.
Once Abramhoff starts naming names, we may get a rare glimpse into the
scumbaggery of the GOP. If you don't think the former lobbying king is going to exact a pound of flesh, just check out his new style. He looks like The Godfather. There will be more than one political career "sleeping with the fishes" before Abramhoff is done.
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Barbara and George Sr. did not raise their children right. It is becoming increasingly clear that George Jr and Jeb have a deep disdain for the Constitution.
In the latest example of the courts having to stop the Bush family from ruining America, The Florida Supreme Court
struck down, 5-2, a statewide voucher scheme that allowed children to attend private schools at taxpayer expense. The high court said the program undermines the public schools and violates the Florida Constitution's requirement of a uniform system of free public education.
Of course, Bush tried to hide under the veil of "accountability" although we all know he was trying to funnel taxpayer's money into fundamentalist schools.
"I think it is a sad day for accountability in our state," Bush said. He said the voucher program had a positive effect because it "put pressure on school districts to focus on the underperforming schools."
Bush's BS reminds me of the dishonest parents in Dover, Pennsylvania who said that the Intelligent Design theory they tried to get into public schools had nothing to do with religion. It is amazing that people who purport to be Christians will stoop to such depths of deception to force other people to pray to their God.
Jeb says that he might push for a Constitutional amendment to obliterate the separation of Church and State and allow vouchers. This seems to the the Republican answer to everything: "The American Constitution offers freedom, so lets change the document."
Has their ever been a ruling elite with less respect for the values and laws that have governed this nation? Hasn't America had enough of the Bush family? By the time they leave office, will we even recognize this country?
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Thursday, January 05, 2006
The Associate Press reports that Pat Robertson suggested Thursday that Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's stroke was divine punishment for "dividing God's land." God considers this land to be his," Robertson said on his TV program
The 700 Club."You read the Bible and he says 'This is my land,' and for any prime minister of Israel who decides he is going to carve it up and give it away, God says, 'No, this is mine.' Sharon "was dividing God's land and I would say woe unto any prime minister of Israel who takes a similar course to appease the European Union, the United Nations, or the United States of America."
In Robertson's broadcast from his Christian Broadcasting Network in Virginia Beach, the evangelist said he had personally prayed about a year ago with Sharon. If anything, God punished Sharon for being stupid enough to pray with such an ass crack.
In this, there is a lesson for Jews who are stupid and naive enough to cultivate evangelical "support" for Israel:
A group that only likes you so Jesus will return in the Rapture and kill you is not a friend.
Let us hope Sharon recovers. Lately, he was making tough choices and moving Israel and the Palestinians closer towards peace. Now that the corrupt terrorist Arafat is dead, Sharon was able to move the peace process forward. However, if he recovers, he should reevaluate his "friends" in America who pray for Israeli civil war and destruction to live out their psychotic biblical fantasies.
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My new motto: Mind you manners in the mist.Yesterday, I was in the steamroom at the gym and this asshole walks in and starts breathing heavy while sitting there. How could I relax when he was making all these strange noises? In the mist, be quiet!
A second jerk walks in, who looked like Mr. Clean, and begins to do stretching exercises, while counting his repetitions. Isn't this what the gym is for?
A third creep enters who looks like Bigfoot. He takes out a razor and begins to shave IN THE MIST!
Look folks, the steamroom is supposed to be used for proper reasons- like relaxing or having sex. No one wants to hear your loud panting or see you working out. And certainly, no one wants to have anything to do with your disgusting hair that has fallen onto the tile seats. God created the sink for shaving, not the steamroom.
Am I wrong about this? How about some etiquette, boys?
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(Lou Sheldon, Creep Obsessed With Gay Sex)Sheldon came to my office,
Carlson wrote, for an interview when I was just starting out in the business. We sat across from each other in my cubicle and I threw a series of questions at him. He answered each one impatiently, then stopped me. "You want to know what the single biggest problem facing inner-city black neighborhoods is?" Yes, I nodded, readying my pen and pad. Sheldon paused. "Homosexuality," he said.
Homosexuality was the biggest problem in the inner cities? Bigger than crime? And unemployment? And poverty? And broken families? And AIDS? And for that matter, graffiti? Nope, there was no way around it.
What the Reverend Lou had said was bizarre. And creepy too.
Carlson also pointed out that the Traditional Values Coalition's Lou Sheldon and former Christian Coalition head Ralph Reed are in bed with sleazy lobbyist Jack Abramhoff. The talk show host wisely urges conservatives not to defend these corrupt losers.
Weirdos and charlatans and self-interested hacks like Lou Sheldon and Grover Norquist have long discredited the conservative ideas they purport to represent. Their political allies in Washington and Congress may be tempted to defend them. I hope they don't. We'll all be better off when they're gone.
I rarely agree with Carlson, since his ridiculous bow tie is obviously cutting off blood from his brain. But in this case, he is offering the conservatives sound advice.
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Wednesday, January 04, 2006
I promised I would not post blog items until Thursday, but I could't help it with this juicy item. I guess this creep didn't attend the ex-gay ministries the Psycho Baptist Convention promotes.
A leader of the Southern Baptist Convention has
been arrested in Oklahoma City on a lewdness complaint for allegedly propositioning a plainclothes policeman.
Police say the Reverend Lonnie Latham was arrested Tuesday night in a motel parking lot after soliciting an officer who was posing as a male prostitute.
Latham is pastor of South Tulsa Baptist Church and is on the executive committee of the Southern Baptist Convention. He has spoken out in the past against homosexuality and same-sex marriage.
After posting bond, Latham told K-F-O-R T-V in Oklahoma City that he was set up, and was in the area ministering to people.
Latham has spoken out against same-sex marriage and in support of a Southern Baptist Convention directive urging its 42,000 churches to befriend gays and lesbians and try to convince them that they can become heterosexual "if they accept Jesus Christ as their savior and reject their 'sinful, destructive lifestyle."'
It seems the good reverend went a little too far "befriending" gay people.
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Tuesday, January 03, 2006
(Weekly Column)Giving new meaning to a pyramid scheme, a recent New York Times article discussed how the pharmaceutical industry hires college cheerleaders as its drug representatives.
"They don't ask what the major is," T. Lynn Williamson, a cheering advisor for University of Kentucky, said of the drug companies who turn to the school to find pompom pill pushers.
Of course, the pharmaceutical giants would have us believe it's coincidental that their reps look like runway models. Lambert Amoretti, a spokesperson for Bristol-Myers Squibb said that hiring cheerleaders "has nothing to do with looks, it's the personality."
And all this time I thought it was portly gals, such as Ricky Lake circa Hairspray, who had the great personalities. I guess you learn something new every day.
Not everyone is buying the silly spin.
"There is a saying that you'll never meet an ugly drug rep," The University of Michigan's Dr. Thomas Carli told the Times.
Before we get upset at the pharmaceutical companies, we should look in the mirror. The most important decisions we often make have more to do with the superficial than the serious. For example, author Malcolm Gladwell wrote in "Blink," his best selling book, that when it comes to choosing CEOs, the size of the body is more important that that of the brain:
"In the U.S. population, about 14.5 percent of all men are six feet or taller. Among CEO's of Fortune 500 companies, that number is 58 percent. Even more striking, in the general American population, 3.9 percent of adult men are six foot two or taller. Among my CEO sample, almost a third were six foot two or taller."
No wonder why Ross Perot is nuts and Napoleon had a complex! They had to overcome incredible odds. If you apply this to presidential politics it seems that platform shoes matter more than the actual platform. Which just goes to show how inept the Kerry campaign was, with the taller man coming up short.
Unattractive people also have the misfortune of being less memorable. Another Times article points out "the power of a 'distinctive face' often renders actors who possess them paradoxically anonymous. Filmgoers are frequently unable to remember their names, even if they can describe their roles."
On the opposite side of the spectrum, attractive people have to overcome the perception that they are stupid. I call this the Dan Quayle syndrome. "Hey, let's put the hot Midwestern Senator on the ticket who can't spell potato. What a great idea!"
Attractive people also have to deal with sexual impropriety. Sure, they have an easier time getting a foot in the door. Unfortunately, some clients think it's the door to the bedroom. An informal survey conducted by a doctor in Pittsburgh found that 12 out of the 13 medical saleswomen said physicians had sexually harassed them.
The question we must ask, is what will become of these women when their pompoms turn into bonbons and their splits into banana splits? Will sexy gay bartenders be driven to drink and Hooters girls left to bitterly gnaw on wings when they begin to look more like the customers they serve?
If it is okay to hire based on looks, than it is okay to fire? Federal law is silent on the matter of discrimination based on appearance, although a case is winding its way through the courts.
A West Virginia surgeon and lawmaker wants to call off the eye candy and require all drug reps to have science degrees. I'm sure he'll be real popular at the next annual convention!
A new cult movie on Quantum Physics, "What the Bleep Do We Know," suggests that we are programmed to be shallow. (Of course, this is the same movie that interviews Dr. Jeffrey Satinover, a quack that says Prozac may "cure" homosexuals.) In vivid detail, the film shows how seeing someone attractive floods our bloodstream with massive amounts of endorphins - the body's version of smack. In a physiological sense, we are junkies and the pharmaceutical companies, wise to our weaknesses, are using hotties and hunks to give us our daily fix.
I revamped my resume this afternoon and had to wonder if my most effective references weren't my personal trainer and hair stylist. In today's world, if an employer calls back and is interested in a second look, you have to take this literally, or at face value, so to speak. And if all else fails, just look at the interviewer and blurt out: "Gooooo Team!!!!!"
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