You can purchase an autographed copy of Anything But Straight by sending a $35 check or money order to:
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Wayne Besen
PO Box 25491
Brooklyn, NY 11202
There is no such thing as an "ex-gay." There are gay people who are out, and those who remain in the closet. Some homosexuals cynically sell their souls and join anti-gay forces to make some dough. The excellent blog of Mike Tidmus lampoons these media and money whores. Check out his web-site.
14 Comments:
Which one is john and which one is jane? Gary (NJ)
posted by Anonymous, at
2/24/2006 1:38 PM
I don't feel sorry for Paulk or his wife whatsoever. He made his bed, and now he can *lie* in it. And I bet, behind closed doors, he sleeps alone. What's more, the "ex-gay" fundamentalists contradict what was supposed to be one of their most cherished beliefs...that salvation is a gift from God.
No one can do ANYTHING to earn their salvation, they say, and God will not and cannot accept any human effort to do so. In their fairy tale, you just have to believe (or be tortured for all eternity). As you can see, the ex-gay nonsense even contradicts their very own theology. Ex-gays hate themselves more than they trust God.
posted by Anonymous, at
2/24/2006 1:46 PM
"There is no such thing as an "ex-gay."
OK, what is the definition of "gay" in the first place?
Is it having a romantic attraction to men?
There are men who've had STRONG attractions like that for as long as they can remember, who have lost them.
Is it being sensitive and/or artistically talented?
No, there are plenty of everstr8t artists.
What is the definition of "gay" that's so impossible to lose?
posted by Anonymous, at
2/24/2006 2:19 PM
These people are pathetic. How they've managed to dupe so many people with their absurd act is beyond me. They make their living by preying on vulnerable people and ruining their lives. Did you ever notice that the only "success stories" the ex-gays can ever come up with are the professional "ex-gays" who's livelihood depends on keeping up the charade? Take away the cash motive and Paulk would be back in drag in a minute.
posted by Sam, at
2/24/2006 2:25 PM
'There is no such thing as an "ex-gay."'
Besen has no way of knowing whether that is true or not, and shouldn't make such claims. Besides, so what if there were ex-gays? Would this be such a terrible thing?
So long as Besen is happy being gay, it shouldn't make any difference to him that some people who are not happy being gay can go straight, either totally or partially.
Constantly repeating the dogma that 'there is no such thing as an ex-gay' - like other people repeat 'OM MANI PADME HUM' or 'there is no god but Allah and Muhammad is his prophet' - suggests insecurity and defensiveness, not confidence.
posted by Anonymous, at
2/24/2006 4:02 PM
But one could also say the same thing about you, that you are the one being defensive by arguing the opposite on this very website. I don't think Wayne is defensive. I think he is offended by the ex-gay lie and has a clear moral vision, even a calling, to expose an industry that has caused thousands of people so much incredible pain and spiritual hand-wringing. I would say that's something worth getting ticked trying to put an end to.
posted by Anonymous, at
2/24/2006 4:43 PM
Wayne isnt 'the one' saying there is no such thing as 'ex-gay' the professional community of psychologists and psychiatrists maintain this position. Also, we attack the 'ex-gay' movement for destroying people psychologically, driving them to suicidal depressions AND emptying their pockets at the same time. ALSO, they actively agitate and work against gay rights for the rest of us...so, it is *they* who need to learn a live and let live attitude--not us!!! Gary (NJ)
posted by Anonymous, at
2/25/2006 10:06 AM
Amen to that Gary. I was an ex-gay for 15 years. By the end of the charade I was depressed and suicidal. That is when I realized that it was time to re-examine s my beliefs and deal with my life more realistically. That is when I came out, because that seemed like a more sane way to deal with my sexuality than killing my self.
During my 15 years as an ex-gay I knew nobody who truely had changed his orientation. But I did know some who changed their behaviour, by marrying women and fathering children. All of them, however would admitt to srill "strugling" with homosexual "temptation" and admit the fact that they (that is-all ex-gays) would experience homosexual temptation for the rest of their lives.In fact I attended Portland Fellowship- in Oregon. I personally knew Jason Thompson, Phil Hobizal and the Paulks. Interestingly enough- and this has been noted eslwhere on this blog- as the main "successfull" exgay stories that I knew locally in Portland ALL of them were on the Portland Fellowships pay-roll (ex-gay-for-pay). It could also be noted that 2 of the above 4 success stories are soiled by failure (those of Phil Hobizol and john Paulk) And One last comment Many of the people I knew who went to Portland Fellowship for help were worse off at the end than the beginning of their "healing journey" having developed drug or alcohol dependencies or suicidal tendencies. So much for Faith moving mountains. Jaylen of San Diego
posted by Anonymous, at
2/25/2006 3:49 PM
To Kurt W.,
To answer your question: "What is so impossible to lose?"
Homosexuality is a sexual orientation. Most people are born heterosexuals but a small minority of all mammals, including humans, are born homosexual.
Saying that someone can go from being gay to being straight is exactly like saying that someone can go from being straight to being gay.
We are talking about a person's basic, instinctive, innate, sexual and romantic and emotional attractions.
That is a huge part of any person.
Sexual orientation is determined in the hypothulmus region of the brain. It is biological. It is NOT psychological.
It would be like making someone short [say 5'0"] into a tall person. You can't do it.
You are operating under the assumption that it is psychological. It is NOT.
It is biological.
Maybe someday there will be surgery or drugs that would change that part of their brain but those things do not exist today.
If they did - who is to say that the way someone is born is wrong anyway??
If I prayed to have blue eyes instead of green - do you think that I would wake up one morning with blue eyes?
That is what the "Ex-gays" are claiming.
And - most importantly - they are claiming that because their religious beliefs do not allow them to accept the way they were born.
Anonymous, it doesn't make any sense to make a distinction between biological and psychological. Anything that's part of our mental experience is both.
posted by Anonymous, at
2/28/2006 2:26 AM
Shalom Y'all
I would like to encourage people to learn about Living Waters/Desert Stream and what they claim, what scriptures they use to support those claims, and how you might respond if you were a GLBT person who had a history of sexual abuse. My experience with this particular ministry happened to me while I was working in a fundamental Christian agency and a person in this ministry projected venomous homophobia on me because I "made her slip in her sexual sobriety". I had never felt the kind of love I did for anybody on the planet until I met her. I had been through a marriage and divorce and discovered my true orientation with her. Sadly, I absorbed all of her messages and the ministries and have had to detox and learn a different truth for myself and God. It took me 6 months to do this. I literally had to be deprogrammed. For those that have gotten out of these ministries, if you feel led please share how you did it.
Yeah -- i find it interesting that John's new career bio on his website mentions nothing about his anti-gay past. It also seemed to be filled with a bunch of fake jobs and training as a chef. At the time he was supposedly a male prostitute, he was also a head chef?
posted by Christopher Ryan, at
5/16/2006 3:26 PM
